The Human Condition

When we have something great happen to us, as individuals, we relish in it and cherish it - for a short period of time (in my case 48 hours). Conversely, if something terrible happens, anything from the relatively trivial event of spilling coffee on the crotch of a pair of brand new white pants to the catastrophic death of a loved one, we dwell on it almost infinately. I may be speaking for myself, who knows, but I do see this same behaviour in others.

I'm sure there are plenty of psychological explanations for this, none of which I will endeavor to publish here. Whenever I have a terrible experience I tend to replay it in my mind over and over for much longer than one should, however when something good happens I almost feel guilty to indulge my self-satisfaction. I often wonder why we are programmed this way since it seems so counter productive and not to mention slightly sociopathic. I once won a competition that I was very proud of but when I received accolades, I downplayed the accomplishment. What the hell?
In comparison, the loss of a lover or a failure on an exam would be picked apart, examined, analysed and held aloft so that all could behold it and comment. What did I do wrong? How could I have made it better or prevented the failure? This will churn in my head during any quiet momment I attempt to steal, of course I am dramatizing for emphasis, it's actually more of an annoying little feeling in the pit of my stomach that doesn't feel right.

This post was triggered by a 'Sex and the City' episode (the one where Carrie is obsessing over Big repeatedly to her friends until they finally break and tell her to see a shrink) which got me thinking about how we deal with heartbreaking events in our lives. Some are private and deal with it quitely while others tire their friends with the endless chorus of "Well what do you think? What should I do? I'm right! Right?. I happen to fall somewhere in the middle (a 60/40 split, I won't distinguish which is which). I personally, would like to deal with my triumph's with same mental effort as I do my tribulations. I think women in general would agree (maybe not my mother-in-law, she's a ROCK!! It's crazy!!) with me on this.

The next time I do something well, I'm going to attempt to dwell on it for a good two weeks, accept the accolades as I do the consoling advice and swirl it around luxuriously in my head as one would with a fine brandy.

The negatives I will try to dismiss with a lazy "Oh it was nothing".